So on June 5th, I started my summer bowling league. I named my team, with unanimous support, "The Banana Splits", since split is a bowling term, and as a reference to the 1960s series.
Tonight, I'm going to share my takes on the 2019 horror movie.
But first, a little history lesson. The 1968 "Banana Splits Adventure Hour" series was a variety program produced by Hanna-Barbera Productions in association with Sid & Marty Krofft. It originally aired on NBC from 1968 to 1970, and re-ran in syndication from late 1970 to the late 90s as "The Banana Splits Show". The series revolved around a Monkees-esque bubblegum rock band consisting of Fleagle the Beagle, Bingo the Orangutan, Drooper the Lion, and Snorky the Elephant, who would present various Hanna-Barbera cartoons to viewers, and would contain interstitial segments featuring the band "making up a mess of fun".
But in 2019, Warner Bros., and SyFy made up a mess of garbage with "The Banana Splits Movie", an R-rated slasher film that has absolutely NOTHING to do with the G-rated fare from the 60s, except for the fact that the Splits are in it.
The movie was produced by a WB subsidiary called "Blue Ribbon Content". *scoffs* That name is ironic, considering what follows afterwards.
Legend says that this movie was originally a script for a Five Nights at Freddy's film (say that 10 times fast), but the series creator Scott Cawthon disapproved of it, so they went with the Banana Splits. This is what I think happened at WB at that moment.
Joe: How's that FNAF movie going, John
John: I just got a message from Scott, he said that he isn't satisfied with the scripts we've produced, and is going to Blumhouse.
Joe: What should we do here? We have a bunch of scripts here, and no characters! Hey George, Patrick, what characters do we have in our library that we can use?
George: Uh, couldn't we just make up new characters?
Joe: We don't have the budget for that
Pat: WhAt iF wE UsE tHe BaNAnA SpLItS?
Joe: Patrick, you're a GENIUS!
(Yup, I put in a SpongeBob reference!)
The story takes place in the 2010s, involves a man named Mitch, his wife, and his son, who is a fan of the Banana Splits. It is the son's birthday, and he got tickets to a taping of the Banana Splits show, which was... apparently not cancelled.
Some other people are revealed, like a group of young influencers and another kid who isn't a fan of the show, but is coming with Mitch's family.
The network hired a new executive, and he wanted the show cancelled because it's just boring now. The Splits, who are now animatronics for some reason, hear about said cancellation and go on a killing spree.
There are some inconsistencies with this movie and the 1968 series. In the movie version of the show, there are messy Nickelodeon-game-show-like minigames and the main focus is the Banana Splits themselves. In the 1968 series, the interstitial Banana Splits sections are just 3 minute long wacky sequences filmed at Six Flags Over Texas, with uber-catchy music. These segments punctuate the cartoons being showcased.
You know what really grinds my gears about this movie? The fact that a movie with the title of "The Banana Splits Movie" could be rated R and have blood, gore, horror violence, and mild language.
Way to ruin childhoods, WB, SyFy, and """"Blue Ribbon Content""""
If you want to watch an ACTUAL Banana Splits movie, Watch the made-for-ABC special "The Banana Splits in Hocus Pocus Park". That one is so much better. I give this movie a ♪ Tra-La-La, La-La-La-Nah ♪.
Edited August 31, 2023 11:52 pm.
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