Nintendo Switch Sports Resort: My takes

 This is The Chronicles of Trevor, where the sun is shining and the threat of invasion is 0%.

    If you've seen my post on Nintendo Switch Sports, you'll see that I hate the game due to its use of the avatars called Sportsmates, the awkward control changes, and the overall aesthetic.

And I'm not the only one who thinks this. Popular Nintendo YouTuber Demeech made a series of videos talking about his beef with the game, covering topics like the Sportsmates, the lack of fun easter eggs like in the original Wii Sports games, the less-than-stellar presentation, and the overall requirement of online play to progress and unlock everything. Yes, folks, you need to be a Nintendo Switch Online subscriber to unlock everything quicker.

But guess what folks, Nintendo, a few weeks ago, announced a SEQUEL to Nintendo Switch Sports! A SEQUEL!  You'd think that Nintendo would've learned their lesson with the Sportsmates, and reintroduced Mii characters to the center stage, especially after the success of Tomodachi Life: Living The Dream.

But Look,

at.

THIS!!!

Yup, that is a SPORTSMATE on a Power Cruiser, in the seas of WUHU ISLAND!

That's because they announced "Nintendo Switch Sports Resort" for the Switch 2.

I have some theories about the Sportsmates' appearance on this island.

One, is that they pulled a Russia and invaded Wuhu Island (albeit succesfully compared to Putin's invasion) and turned it into a shell of its former self.

Second, the Sportsmates renovated and filled in land surrounding Spocco Square and made their own bootleg Wuhu Island, hence why there are signs reading "Spocco Resort". Makes sense since the Sportsmates look more suited to a game like Go Vacation or Kinect Sports than a Wii Sports sequel.

Lastly, and the most horrifying of all, is that these sickos probably planned a mass murder of the 100 beloved Miis on the island, all because their leader said "We must secure the existance of our people and a future for Sportsmate children". They must've blown up the island, and that's why the town is on the former beach.

Also, I think the Sportsmates would've changed the lore with any of these. Back on the original Wuhu Island, Miis only drove electric cars. Sportsmates seem like the kind of people that would pollute the once clean island, hence why the island looks foggy all the time.

I'm thinking about buying a Wii U so I can play Wii Sports Resort in HD. That is by FAR the best way to enjoy Wuhu Island nowadays. Yes, I think THIS would be the main reason people are cleaning that super thick layer of dust off their Wii Us, because of the disappointment that Nintendo caused with this announcement.

Also, THUMB WRESTLING? THEY GOT RID OF SWORDPLAY SHOWDOWN FOR THUMB WRESTLING? What the heck Nintendo?!